During dating, behavior is at its best. Both parties exert the effort to make sure that everything goes well. There are times that the needs of your date comes first before your own. You slowly build a feeling that you are somehow special to him or her. You’re always together.

“Man is not the creature of circumstances. Circumstances are the creature of man.”…Benjamin Disraeli

Can you remember the dates you had with your spouse? Let’s go back in time ...

As the dating itself progressed for longer periods of time, you began to unravel the mystery in that special someone. You have learned more about him or her. Without noticing it, your feelings for him or her grew deeper. You also noticed that you really wanted to spend more time together. Nothing matters except the two of you being together. Every decision that you made revolved around that person. He or she has become your universe.

All these good feeling made a good impact on you. You’re always on cloud nine. You’re always happy. You said that this is the life you have always dreamed of from the start. He or she treated you like royalty. Every day, your life seemed so bright and carefree.

You wanted these things to last a lifetime, so you decided to get married. You set the date and purchased things needed for the big event. You’re excited to buy the rings. You made a design specific to suit your taste. You couldn’t wait for the wedding. You really wanted to spend the rest of your life with that person.

As the wedding date grew near, you can’t help but feel very much nervous. You were both excited. The wedding ended in a flash and you soon found yourselves all set for your honeymoon. What a great terrific life!

I was shaking while walking my way to the altar. I can’t walk properly. My feet were too heavy as if I’m a wearing shoe made of stone. I was happy and at the same time afraid, actually, its mixed emotion. The nearer I got, the more I became afraid. I looked straight ahead. At first I could see nobody. I concentrated. There on the right side of the altar was my husband, smiling lovingly at me. The fear vanished into thin air at that instant.

Why am I telling you all of these? Upon recalling the past, did it make you smile? What were the feelings then? Exhilarating, right? If those things gave you sheer pleasure, then why not do it on a regular basis?

Mr. and Mrs. Smith have been married for three decades now. Their children have also started to build a family. They look so good together, as if they just got married yesterday. Care to know the secret? For the past thirty years, they keep the fire burning by means of regular dating. They believe that it is one of the factors why they stayed together for three decades now.

Dating is not only limited to unmarried couple. It should also be enjoyed after marriage. We know life now is entirely different because of the bigger responsibilities and the kids, but dating is very important even after marriage.

“Everyone should carefully observe which way his heart draws him, and then choose that way with all his strength.”--------Hasidic Saying

Dating will keep the bond between you and your spouse intact. Try to spend some time alone with your spouse. This is very critical. If you believe that you can’t concentrate while on the house because of the kids, then do it outside the comfort of your home. Say for example, a two days and two nights stay in a nearby resort. This will surely bridge the gap brought about by being busy everyday. It is a way of coping up with each other’s activities.

If you’re not comfortable leaving the children to a sitter, perhaps you could leave them to your parent’s house. Or if you believe that you’ll surely enjoy the trip as a family then let the children tag along. It depends on you on how you will enjoy company of your spouse with or without the children.

Take the case of Zum and Jamie as an example. They have been married for 5 years now, blessed with a daughter and a son. Jamie is a housekeeper while Zum works in a brokerage firm. He usually comes home late at night, leaves early the following day. He works five times a week. What do you think he does on weekends? He wakes up early, prepares breakfast and serves his wife and kids. After breakfast they usually go out, a picnic in a park or a stroll in a mall. He always makes sure to spend his weekend time with his family. Saturday night is quite special to him. He and Jamie always have dinner in a modest restaurant.

No matter how busy you are, find time to spend it with your spouse.

“To keep a lamp burning we have to keep putting oil in it.”-----------Mother Teresa

Dating reduces the so-called empty nest syndrome. Empty nest is the feeling of emptiness when a spouse is left all alone in the home. This is natural and considered harmless but we cannot be sure sometimes because this syndrome also has its dark side.

Maria is a traveler. She enjoys travelling the countryside. Every weekend without fail, she and her husband Tom set out for an out of town trip. She feels rejuvenated every time she tours around. According to her, their relationship has grown so much because of that. The closeness they have right now is even more remarkable as compared before.

Great marriages don’t just happen. You have to do something to make it last. Improve your marriage now. Remember that improvement is not a one-time event. It’s a process, so better start now.

Avoid doing the same things over and over again. This is very risky. This will lead to boredom and eventually can be a factor for disparity.